WTF Happened-Part 2

Ok, where was I? Oh, yes the heavens had parted and Girl had seen the Fibromyalgia light. It truly was an amazing day. To finally put a name on the amorphous pains and the increasing fatigue that had plagued the Girl was unbelievable.
Girl scours Internet (mind you, it was 1999) and prints out page and page of stories of people with symptoms like hers.
Girl's joy at naming her pain slowly turns to depression as this Internet research came to one pointed conclusion: there was no cure for her newly named disease. In fact, many doctors still did not believe it was truly a disease.
Girl continues on. She goes to miracle chiro three days a week. She also tries several rheumatoid arthritis doctors who "specialize" in fibromyalgia treatment. These treatments seemed to entail more and more medicine, especially anti-depressants.
Girl takes medicine. Girl is a zombie on the floor. Girl refuses medicine. Doctors shrug their shoulders.
Girl has, in the meantime, moved in with an amazingly supportive and loving man. Let this fact not be underrated. This fact may have been the main reason Girl managed to live through the constant pain and fatigue.
Not as supportive-Girl's work. Let it suffice to say, after having nine migraines in 7 days, and receiving little to no support from the place she had once loved so dearly, Girl marched into her boss's boss's office and quit.
Girl's husband, who is only her boyfriend at the time, applauds decision.
Girl decides her health can be her full time job...for now.
That was nine years ago.
Girl had incredibly difficult time NOT being a lawyer anymore. Girl often began (and still does) sentences with "I used to be a lawyer..."
Girl has been doing yoga for years. Friend says to try Pilates.
Girl meets PT at Pilates who tells her to go to endocrinologist who is "performing miracles." Endo runs tests that indicate Girl has human growth hormone of 60 year old woman.
Girl agrees to shoot Human Growth Hormone into herself every day. Girl secretly wonders if HGH will make her into a 20 year again. HGH does not.
Girl does feel better-ish. Girl works out 30 minutes and shoots up with HGH every day. Girl also takes wellbutrin during the day and ativan to sleep and goes to Feldenkrais twice a week.
Just as Girl has found a program that works, alarm, alarm! Girl's biological clock starts going off. So Girl must go off...all her meds...this takes six months and then..boom..pregnant!
Girl has difficult pregnancy-let's brush over that whole thing-and is blessed with an amazing son.
After recovering from a C section and breast feeding for 8 months, Girl tries to go back on meds. Where Wellbutrin made her body and brain happy prior to pregnancy, it now makes her craaaazy. She tries old med after new med again and again. Girl also has a wonderful bouncing baby boy now. Girl is terrified she will drop beautiful boy so Girl gets amazing nanny.
Girl is very lucky.
One lovely May morning, Girl wakes up with invisible spear piercing her left temple. Girl feels as if she is, while being pierced by said spear, also wearing a large hat with a grey feather that is just out of her peripheral vision. Girl's pain is at that really really sad face on the pain scale.
Girl runs from eye doctor to tumor doctor to stroke doctor, from MRI to CAT scan. Medicine after medicine is prescribed, including some that make her crawl into a closet for fear of her life. She is given the "Superbowl Migraine Medicine" which makes her nose stuffy, but little else. She is given a fentanyl patch which makes her pass out. Doctor who prescribed it is surprised to hear that patches had recently been recalled due to inexact dosages.
Girl does not seem to have a tumor nor did she had a stroke. All good news, but what is left? Doctors think it is a migraine. Girl has had migraines for years. Not a migraine. Doctors also discover Girl has hole in heart-a genetic defect that many migraine sufferers have. Girl is assessed and it is decided heart surgery to close hole is too risky, so doctors suggest waiting until AFTER her first stroke to fix said hole. After all, who knows when that will happen? It'll be so much fun to wait to see...
Girl is given neurontin and lexapro and adds the less sharp spear in her head to her bag of tricks that she carries with her.
After a year on those meds, Girl weans off to see what is underneath. Is the spear gone? Is she better? Does she need different meds? Can she please just be off meds?
Girl is not better. Girl wants to try more new things, so follows advice of friend and drives hours to see yet another new doctor who swears and promises this clinic has the answer. The answer, it seems, entails many, many hormones and medicines that the clinic makes itself. Health insurance company is unimpressed and refuses to cover. Girl is desperate so continues to drive hours and pay hundreds for hormones.
Girl slowly turns into Jack Nicholson from the Shining. Girl believes world will come to an end; Girl believes there is no hope; Girl begins drinking with invisible bartender from the 20s...
Girl's father insists she see one of his students at a major LA hospital. Girl does not want to see yet another doctor. Girl finally goes when she thinks of chasing Olive Oyl through a maze in upstate New York.
New doctor is a revelation! Not only is she up to date on fibromyalgia, she also believes in combining Eastern and Western Medicine!! Girl starts on a treatment on acupuncture and meds, including back on the neurontin and lexapro.
One day, husband reads in paper about amazing Fibromyalgia boot camp at different major LA hospital.
Girl wants in. It take several months, but it happens. Girl cannot believe that there is a place where people not only believe in Fibro, but have ideas how to manage it and want to share those ideas.
So here we are...and here we go....